Shortly after getting engaged, once things really start getting real, the first thing you’re likely to start thinking about is your wedding guest list and this can throw up all sorts of dilemmas.
The wedding guest list is the one thing that most brides would say brought them the most amount of stress during the wedding planning process, thanks to it being fraught with family politics, plus one confusion and possible offence, but there are some things that you can work with to make your life a little easier.
There’s no pleasing everyone when it comes to sending out invites, but there is a way to avoid unnecessary upsets – yours and your friends!
Here are a few wedding guest list problems, solved:
His & Hers Sides
You know how there’s that old tradition of having a bride’s side and a groom’s side as you walk up the aisle? Scrap it.
There’s no need to cause yourself any added stress and feeling as though you have to split the list between you and your spouse makes things much more difficult than they need to be. Your other half might have a way bigger family than you, or maybe one of you has a lot more close friends – if you’re trying to make up numbers by going halves on the total, you’re setting yourself up for a room full of people that you might not really want there as you say your ‘I dos’.
Keep the ceremony list to the people that you want to have present as you seal the deal and forget the logistics of it all.
The issue of a ‘Plus One’ is almost always raised by a friend or five who want to bring along their new beau you’ve never met and if you’re a bit put out by this, you’re not the only one!
Many newly weds who got hitched on a budget say that they regret allowing their guests to bring a plus one, because it ended up doubling the expense and filling the room full of strangers. It’s understandable that guests who don’t know many people might feel nervous about going stag, but sometimes that’s just the way it’s got to be.
If you’ve got the money to spare for extra meals and drinks, then by all means go for the Plus One invites (your guests will thank you for it!), but don’t feel as though you have to.
As an alternative, you could always invite the Plus Ones along to the evening party – there’s no harm in having extra bodies on the dance floor!
Kids or No Kids?
Children can make a wonderful addition to a wedding day – they’re cute and fun and great conversationalists, but that doesn’t mean that they’re for everyone.
If the wedding day you’ve envisaged doesn’t include kids, then by all means, don’t feel pressured into inviting them but do expect a lot of your parent friends to drop out. Don’t take this personally – sometimes figuring out how to get away for a night without the bubs is easier said than done and how ever much they might relish the idea, it’s just not going to be possible for some people. If there are certain guests with children who you absolutely can’t stand to not have along to your big day, you might have to end up making an exception, especially for those with very young children and breastfeeding mothers.
If you do decide to have kids come along, you could always hire some on-site help to give parents a break. There’s loads of great stuff available, from professionally manned kids party tents to wedding nannies – do your research and see what works best for you.